Kitchen appliance relationship trouble

October 30, 2006 at 11:39 pm 2 comments

The kitchen appliances hate me. Some new ones have shown up and I think they resent my presence. Or maybe they just think I’m interfering with their daily routines.

You want proof? OK, when I’m loading groceries into the refrigerator after shopping, the refrigerator beeps at me. Not some gentle reminder like ‘Hey, you might have forgotten to close the door there buddy.’ Oh no; it’s more of a ‘Hey idiot, can’t you see I’m trying to keep stuff cold in here?’ kind of a beep. Like a 1983 Honda Civic car horn, kinda. Other times, the refrigerator will be sitting there quietly clicking and humming away but when I open the door it gets quiet and stops making any noise until I shut the door. And even then it waits for a few seconds before quietly clicking and humming again just to make sure I’m not going rush back over and open that door right up again.

The new microwave/range hood doesn’t really resent my presence in the kitchen so much as think I’m an idiot. (I may or not be an idiot but it hurts to think that the microwave/range hood thingie thinks I am.) When you’re cooking or using the timer it beeps to signal the ending of it’s timeriness, and that’s fine. But the ‘idiot at the controls part’ is where after a few seconds it beeps again saying ‘Hey, I said I was done over here, come tell me it’s OK and press the cancel button now.’ And it keeps doing it until you’re done pouring half of the corn you were tying to drain by using the hot-handled lid as a corn dam while tilting the steaming pan over the garbage disposal inlet and you put the corn pan down and press ‘cancel’. Or maybe that’s just me. I think somebody didn’t get enough cancel button love because the new microwave/range hood thingie needs its cancel button pushed whenever we play cooking or timer.

So far the new stove, dishwasher and garbage disposal are behaving themselves, but I’m keeping my on them.


Entry filed under: Food and Drink, Humor, Technology.

Insulated Concrete Form construction Bitch Entitlement

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. mando  |  October 31, 2006 at 9:14 am

    it sounds like you’re working too hard.
    Nice page, btw.

  • 2. greg  |  October 31, 2006 at 10:10 am

    Or maybe not working hard enough? Thanks, whatever the case is.


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